Monday, January 04, 2010

Unmet Expectations... AGAIN!

Well, I got snared by unmet expectations, AGAIN...

I got all excited, thinking that we qualified for the extended homebuyers tax credit, available to those who owned homes for the last 8, lived in them for the last 5, etc... turns out it only applies to people who bought another home AFTER Nov 6th of 09... Bleh. I thought that the dates of the firstime home buyers credit were the same as the ones for the people who bought another home... :(

I was truly chomping at the bit to file our taxes so that we could get that $6500 and use it toward the remaining $12,000-13,000 left of the adoption expenses... not so.

So, I'm back to the drawing board of wondering HOW IN THE WORLD we're going to pull this off without going into debt.

And to top it all off, I'm starting to have dreams about our daughter, her birth mom, etc... I'm getting so messed up in my heart about it all, and it's still out there as this indefinite, etherial, almost-imaginary experience I'm going through. It feels at times like I'm pretending that I'm going to bring home another baby.

How much longer, Lord?


Aimee said...

The waiting is the hard stuff. I'm sorry this is so hard. I wish I had the perfect, most right words. All I can offer is: I love you and I'm praying for you.

Laura said...

God will provide in ways that YOU can't figure out! I was consumed with "figuring out" the financial end of the adoption. We are about to travel in a few months...debt free. God can do it... I don't know how,but He can!! Hang tough with the knowledge that you were called to do this!

Peter and Nancy said...

Eeek. I'm right with you on wondering where and how the finances are going to come through. Someone at church asked if we had all the $ in the bank. I almost burst into (hysterical?) laughter, but restrained myself to just say "no."

I'm sorry to hear that the home credit isn't going to happen, and will keep you in prayer for the money to be provided. In the meantime, your baby is REAL, and is intended for your family . . . hold onto that truth!

Traci said...

Hang in there! I had to remind myself frequently to fear God alone and not all that other stuff. He is often most glorified when we can't "figure it out". Praying for you!